Just another headline dump
(03/03/24 4:00pm)
Humor editors break record long streak of not having a headline dump; no one notices
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Humor editors break record long streak of not having a headline dump; no one notices
This may come as a complete surprise to everyone, but I was not a perfect angel growing up. I’m still not. Despite being on the nice list for the first 18 years of my life, my run of niceness ended last year, when I received a lump of coal from Santa Claus.
I’m sure you’ve heard of No Shave November (I valiantly took on the challenge last year) and some of the … other abstaining challenges for the month. I personally have also had a “no girls will talk to me November.” I’m still not sure if the two are related or not.
Just like every other child, I always looked forward to Halloween (albeit for much different reasons than I do now). Nothing compared to consuming extreme amounts of unhealthy substances while pretending to be someone you’re not in order to forget about your worries. Sound familiar? I don’t think so either.
As everyone who has read my articles knows, I am not a journalism major. Far from it, actually. But sometimes I get the itch to do “journalisming” — particularly absurd journalisming.
Are you a socially struggling first-year? Do you ever spend your Wednesday, Thursday, Friday or Saturday nights getting eight or more hours of sleep? Are you sometimes productive, or do you attend events put on by MAP or even your RA? Then boy have I got something for you.
Student whose dad gave them a J.P. Morgan internship gets return offer after reports of ‘not doing anything all summer’
Love and honor ’em, or hate ’em, we all have to use the public bathrooms that Miami University’s wonderful campus has to offer. But which ones should you go to often, and which ones should you stay away from? We went across campus to find the best (and scariest) latrines.
The Oklahoma Drill — America’s last true test of grit and strength.
With the onset of Miami University’s Associated Student Government president and vice president, The Miami Student Editorial staff endorsed candidates have won. However, the Humor Team would like to recognize the other potential candidates to this race as well (even though it’s over now). Here is a look at who each of our writers would like to see running ASG.
OPD set to place snipers on roofs of bars to pelt unsuspecting, drunk students with water balloons
Breaking News: the “Campus Climate” is a tornado
Green Beer Day. A Miami tradition we all love and honor. Despite being born out of the cruelty of the previous administration, Green Beer Day has become a beneficial addition to Miami University.
Miami ROTC sent to Philadelphia to repair destruction caused by Super Bowl loss