As everyone retreats home for the summer, getting ready for vacations, real food and the privilege of showering without shoes, there is someone left behind in Oxford — the Grubhub robots.
Considering the little robots have nearly tripped me on multiple occasions, I firmly believe they are sentient and pulling a Toy Story, living it up over the summer months.
In fact — here’s exactly what I think they’re doing.
Crossing the road without fear
If you’ve ever watched one of these little robots on their journey to deliver food, you will know how cautious they are in transit.
I once watched one get 90% of the way across the street, and then back all the way up to where it began because a car got within 20 feet of it.
Who knows, maybe they have beef in some electronic language the simple college student cannot translate.
Soaking up the sun
As with nearly every college student, I’m sure the Grubhub robots commit a solid chunk of their summers to tanning.
As their white bodies turn a light shade of grey, they gossip over their Starbucks and swap tales of being kidnapped and vandalized (I’ve seen the horror stories on YikYak).
Updating their LinkedIn
As I’m sure many have seen or heard, Starship Technologies, the group that owns and maintains the robots, will be ending its on-campus operations and shifting to cities.
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I like to think that this was due to the robots refreshing their LinkedIn and resumes, taking the time to polish off and get a professional headshot done.
All that to say, I hope they do well on their future endeavors, but I will miss them and their vengeful nature.
Never stop running into people, little robot.
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