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From office hours to antidepressants: All the things Miami’s taught me

Since nobody asked, for my last Miami Student column, I’ve decided to publish a list of things I’ve learned in my time at Miami University. I did, of course, learn a lot that’s not listed, so if you’d like to know more about Katharine Hepburn’s particular brand of feminism, how Aphrodite was one of the unsung heroes of the Trojan War or how the American media depicts postpartum depression, hit me up at the email listed below.

  1. You need at least one friend in every class. They don’t have to be someone you invite over to watch “The Bachelor,” but you should be able to text them or have the security of knowing you can work with them on a group project if necessary.

  2. At some point, you might get lonely. And one of your friends might also be lonely, and you might decide to start platonically sleeping with them. Don’t do that.

  3. If you find yourself reaching the end of your Instagram or Twitter timelines multiple times a day, just delete the apps off of your phone. You’ll be more productive doing things that actually matter, and you can still check social media on your computer.

  4. Find a way to get out of Oxford occasionally. It’s easy to forget that this is not the whole world.

  5. If a guy is coming over and asks if he should “bring anything,” he definitely means condoms or weed. Not snacks.

  6. You’ll never regret going to class. But things happen, and there will probably be days when you can’t or feel like you can’t, and that is why we have attendance policies.

  7. Someone told me freshman year that it’s okay (even important, some say) to be selfish in your early 20s, as long as you’re not hurting anyone else. I think that’s true. Even if you have friends and family supporting you, you know yourself better than them and you have to do what’s best for you.

  8. If you’re a woman, try to be conscious of how much you apologize and what you apologize for. You’re probably apologizing too much for things that aren’t your fault.

  9. It’s okay to regulate your emotions with antidepressants or other medications. Lots of people do, and they can be incredibly helpful.

  10. It’s also okay if your own mental health issues don’t line up with what you see on TV or what you see your friends experiencing. Issues like depression and anxiety manifest themselves in different ways in everyone, and your experiences are just as valid as anyone else’s.

  11. Go to office hours! A lot of your professors are very cool and you will miss the opportunity to learn that if you do not go to office hours.

  12. As I wrote last month, it really is okay to like or to not like things. Don’t feel bad for consuming whatever type of entertainment you enjoy because it’s not intellectual enough or what your friends are watching. If anyone gives you shit about watching TLC programming or “The Bachelor,” that’s their problem.

  13. In regards to dating, your standards probably aren’t too high, and you probably aren’t high maintenance. The bar is just very, very low.

  14. Wash your face.

  15. Go, and I cannot emphasize this enough, to the Oxford Farmer’s Market on Saturday mornings. The challah, cinnamon rolls and dog sightings are worth it to roll out of bed before noon. There is also fresh lettuce, if you like that kind of thing.

  16. The Mighty Patch does wonders for zits. As I write this, I am wearing three of them.

  17. Your friends are usually right (doesn’t matter about what).

  18. If your college experience doesn’t end up being what you thought it would freshman year, that’s fine. If you’re not happy with your major, change it; if you feel like you need to take time off school, do it. Everything will be okay.