If I could push a button and five people in the world would die, but "30 Rock" stayed on Netflix forever, I'd do it.
Yes, the rumors are true. My beloved "30 Rock" is set to depart Netflix on Oct. 1. The decision leaves many a Liz-Lemon-in-training to ask, "WWJD?" or "What Would Jack Do?"
The whip-smart comedy earned 103 Emmy nominations during its seven years on air and won 11, including Outstanding Comedy Series, Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy, Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy and Outstanding Writing for a Comedy Series. Each episode averages 7.44 jokes per minute, and has produced countless one-liners, perfect for Instagram or Twitter bios.
Case in point? Live every week like it's shark week.
I will miss having Liz and Jack always at my beck and call. How else will I know when it's legal to drive drunk? (The answer -- business drunk and/or rich drunk). Or what to name my children? (Stick to Kings and Queens of England; there will never be a President Ashton or a Dr. Katniss).
As a young woman living through Peak TV(TM) and managing multiple streaming services, I owe a great deal to Tina Fey and her onscreen counterpart, Liz Lemon. "30 Rock" brought us an unlovable, imperfect leading lady years before we met Selina Meyer, Gretchen Cutler, Hannah Horvath, Piper Kerman, Eleanor Shellstrop or Rebecca Bunch. Liz Lemon is the original female antihero, a woman who hates her job, laughs at blind guys eating spaghetti and French-kisses dogs at parties to impress what turned out to be a very tall 12-year-old. Liz is boldly herself, despite every character constantly telling her that she should not be.
"30 Rock's" legacy lives on through countless series and creators. Donald Glover, creator of "Atlanta," got his start as a writer and Tracy Morgan impersonator on "30 Rock." Tracy Wigfield, creator of the NBC comedy "Great News," started as a writer's assistant on the show and eventually won an Emmy for Outstanding Writing for a Comedy Series for the finale she co-wrote. Tina Fey and Robert Carlock have continued roasting New York on "Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt."
Beyond the incredibly talented people the show launched, it also produced THOUSANDS upon THOUSANDS of jokes. One episode of "30 Rock" has enough funny moments to sustain five episodes of any comedy currently on air. In the words of Julie Kessler on "Difficult People," "When did comedies just become half-hour dramas?"
"30 Rock" made you lizz (a combination of laughing and whizzing), and while the characters did grow over the course of the series, at their cores, they remained their morally bankrupt selves. We loved them anyway.
If my passionate defense of the greatest show on television has inspired you to binge it before Netflix snatches it away, my recommendation would be to watch season 3. Guest stars include Salma Hayek, Jon Hamm, Steve Martin, Larry King, Alan Alda, Matt Lauer and Megan Mullally.
Pour out some D'fwine, and try to crush this problem with your mind vice. Rest in Power "30 Rock,"and may Hulu renew your streaming license. Amen.