When “Obsession” actress Inde Navarrette recently appeared on an episode of “Hot Ones Versus,” viewers made a buzz about her behavior. Many dissected her every move and called her a “pick me” girl. It raises the question: Why do women need to be perfect all the time?
Women of all ages are no stranger to this idea, as they’ve always been overly criticized no matter what they say or do. A seemingly normal interview turned into endless scrutiny by the media, especially by female fans calling Navarrette male-centered. Fans also began criticizing other behaviors like her liking cars, video games and anime — all supposedly “male interests”.
Not only do men criticize women, but other women also feed into this never-ending cycle of needing to be perceived perfectly to be respected. It is also no secret that women feel the need to change aspects of their character to be more respected by men. Sydney Sweeney, for example, has become the star at the center of a large controversy.
In a recent advertisement, she is seen covering her nude body with equipment from different sports, speaking to a male audience for the entirety of the ad. Not only did Sweeney, intentionally or not, open the door for more criticism of women in sports careers, but she herself was also criticized for “setting women back,” something men rarely have to worry about.
However you look at this trend, women are getting more and more negative feedback no matter what they do or who they cater toward.
The media’s scrutiny also focuses on the way women treat each other. Following the “Wicked” press tour, actresses Ariana Grande and Cynthia Erivo faced endless mockery from fans and media calling them “weird” and “too obsessed” with each other. When Erivo stepped in to guard Grande from a fan, the people of the internet called her “manly” and said she was “overreacting.” In reality, she was likely just helping her friend in an uncomfortable situation.
Whether two women are close, protective of one another or even simply there for each other, people are quick to give their two cents.
Double standards are hard to ignore. Chris Brown is touring sold-out shows, still has millions of fans and still gets positive reviews in media outlets even after reports of his previous domestic violence. But a similar instance from a woman is a different story.
Amber Heard faced endless scrutiny and mockery after her trial against Johnny Depp. Even if she exaggerated or lied about her experiences, the hatred toward her was blown out of proportion and led several brands to take to sites like TikTok and Instagram to market off the hate train against her.
Not even women-owned businesses can thrive without media illustrating drama between them. Fans and media outlets were quick to pit Hailey Bieber and Selena Gomez against each other following the launches of their makeup and skincare brands. Instead of letting them both succeed, fans decided to pick sides, boycotting the opposing brand and creating elaborate drama between the two in an already competitive market.
At the same time, male-owned businesses and brands are able to thrive on their own without the fear of having their marketing, products and behaviors dissected and heavily compared by the masses.
So why the obsession with tearing women down? Some say it’s jealousy, but I don’t think it is that simple.
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For years, women have had the short end of the stick when it comes to any situation, and there is an internalization of needing to be perfect to be respected. Sometimes that pressure manifests as tearing each other down, and sometimes it drives wedges between women, with some deeming it safer to join in on the hatred rather than be criticized for “sensitively” or “dramatically” defending other women.
If perfection is the price to pay for respect, we need to be standing with and supporting other women. No one can be perfect and if we don’t stand up for others, how can we expect others to stand up for us?
Next time a woman’s behavior is being overly criticized, ask yourself if that criticism would be given to a man doing the same thing.
Veronica Dallas is a sophomore biology pre-med major from Cincinnati. She spends most of her time watching old movies, listening to music of all kinds and planning her next trip somewhere across the world.
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