By Joey Hart, Assistant Opinion Editor
Nineteen hours after initiating the conversation, Adam Grigg confirmed that one cute girl he matched with on Tinder had replied to his opening message.
The girl, known only as "Miley," replied to Grigg's initial message of "Hey ur bikini pic looks really good ;-)" with "Thanks haha" at approximately 6:08 p.m. Thursday evening.
Grigg described his accomplishment as "kind of impressive if you think about it."
"I honestly wasn't even trying that hard to impress anyone," Grigg said. "I guess it just goes to show that confidence can go a long way toward meeting people, and I showed that confidence when I typed a few words on my cell phone screen and pressed send."
Grigg credited his match with his witty Tinder bio which reads "It's going down, I'm yelling Tinder" as well as his low-angle profile photo, which hides the fact that he is 5'5."
Because most of Miley's pictures featured more than one girl, Grigg explained, he was initially unable to determine whether or not she was "the hot one." He added that once he found out who the common denominator in every picture was, he knew she was an unquestionable right swipe.
"I'm not going to lie, I was a little skeptical at first," Grigg said. "But when I saw that she was simply using pictures of herself with her less attractive friends in order to make herself look better, I was certain she was the girl for me."
Grigg said he is going to wait three or four hours to reply back to Miley so she wouldn't think he's "too thirsty."
This piece was a work of satire.Enjoy what you're reading?
Signup for our newsletter
Read More
TikTok bans: Public education held hostage by politics
By Anastasija Mladenovska | 10 hours agoStill, we don’t understand the importance of a tool, especially social media in today’s world, until we feel its existence is threatened. Now, the U.S. government wants to tell my friends that they are not going to have access to the platform anymore because TikTok is a national security issue.
When a man laughs
By Lilly McClelland | YesterdayOpinion writer Lilly McClelland explores why when a man laughed at her joke, it made her feel more special than when a woman does.
I played every New York Times game for a week
By Meredith Perkins | 6 days agoColumnist Meredith Perkins ranks the New York Times games after playing them all each day for a week.