Miami Student

Issue date: 4/18/08 Section: OpEd Page

I'm over Facebook.com. My apologies to Mark Zuckerberg, but after three years, everyone's favorite social networking site for college students/high school students/professors/that weird townie who goes through your garbage looking for aluminum cans to deposit, is getting old.

Maybe I've not caught on to this whole "Internet craze" and all-I mean, I do work for a newspaper-but I think Facebook has lost its luster and needs to be buried in the metaphorical "played out" cemetery, along with AIM (1998-2002) and Ja Rule (1999-2003).

With that said, I'm not going to lie; I used to be addicted. In its heyday, Facebook was a great tool for my friends and I from home-despite being at different schools and across the country from each other-to stay in touch … mostly by making fun of girls who got fat since high school. Kidding … but seriously.

In addition to reaching that first step with people toward real friendship (Facebook friendship), I used to be one of the few who loved the news feed homepage a couple years back. Where else could I see my friend break up with her boyfriend, get back together, break up again and then enter a new relationship with her sorority sister all over the course of six hours?

But now I'm over it.

I'm over tagging pictures. Folks, once upon a time looking at photos of your friends pouring the finest malt liquor down a funnel for a naughty secretary at a "CEO's and Ho's" party was awesome, but now I've got a new term for it: liability.

I'm over your invitations. I don't want to be a ninja or a zombie or find out what superhero I am. I already dressed up as all of those for Halloween and things have changed. For example, back then when it was cool to pretend you were Batman, people also thought it was cool that Michael Jackson hung out with Macaulay Culkin all the time.

I'm over getting invited to your party, no matter how much jungle juice you have. I agree that freshman orientation was a fun time three years ago, but I still don't know who you are, and don't want to be inside your home while you and your friends, who I also don't know, are intoxicated.

I'm over writing on peoples' wall on their birthday. Seriously, if I know you, I can congratulate you in person-sorry if that's a little too 2004.

I'm over pointless Facebook groups. As cool as it is to see more than 1,000 people in a "Green Beer Day shirts!" or an "I went to public school!" group, I think the congregation seems a little obvious. If you like those groups, maybe I can point you all to an "I breath oxygen" Facebook group. Hear there are some cool folks in that one.

I'm over other Facebook groups too, though. Like ones that are supposed to be about stuff that's important but ends up spawning a bunch of circular arguments. An example I'll use is a recent one that asks whether I agree with someone whose name rhymes with "Cam," where folks of different beliefs come together hoping to prove to the other side they can change firm, inherent and/or adopted beliefs that have been developed for 18-plus years through a few paragraphs in a wall post.

My take on this is like a baseball manager arguing with a third base umpire. You're not going to convince the other side of anything, and inevitably all you're going to do is get yelled at, make an ass of yourself and get thrown out of the game.

I'm over this column. With all that said, you want to friend me?

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