March Madness is upon us, and it means a few things. People will end up rooting for colleges they have never even heard of, thousands will miss class or work to watch the games and someone who knows nothing about college basketball will win their bracket pool.
Last week, I went to downtown Cleveland to watch our Miami RedHawks play in the Mid-American Conference quarterfinals. The final result was the same as last year, ending the season with a loss-this time the win went to the Akron Zips.
While it wasn't meant to be for the RedHawks, it was an ideal game for sneaking to better seats, a staple for events like these.
You see people in movies sneak down to the first row of a sporting event like its no big deal. A sly move here, another there and you are courtside sitting next to Jack Nicholson. Is it really that easy though? At small conference tournament games it's even easier than in the movies.
With half the seats being empty for every game but the championship game, the tickets might as well be general admission.
Every year we go to this tournament, it becomes a contest to see who can get the closest to the court with our $8 upper deck tickets.
Does it take someone as sly as Brad Pitt to get to better seats? Does it take someone as resourceful as Jack Bauer to get to the front row? No, not at all. It takes courage, luck and plenty of common sense.
Through the years I have picked up many valuable lessons for sneaking to better seats from others, including my father.
Probably the most important piece of advice I learned for sneaking to better seats is to make it look like you know what you are doing. The easiest way to get caught is to fumble around looking for your "seat" and drawing the attention of the usher. Eventually they come over and it leads to the embarrassing exchange of them asking to see your tickets, you handing the tickets to them, and usher saying you are two stories from your seats.
Also you need to be realistic. If the game is a sellout, don't even waste your time looking for better seats.
Next thing you need to do is plan ahead. Do some scouting of the seats before you make your move.
Make sure that it is at least a quarter into the game to increase the chances that they original ticket holders don't show up.
Finally you have to have some bail out seats to go to if the right ticket holder actually shows up.
Then if the rightful ticket holder shows up its no big deal, just pull out your tickets and squint at them. Then you just say, "Oh you're right, I must have misread the ticket," and then move to next closest seat. Repeat this process if necessary.
My final piece of advice is to not give up. If your first seats don't work out, try again. If your second seats don't work out, try again. If a security guard escorts you out of the stadium, well, that would probably be a good time to give up. Eventually you should make it to decent seats, even if you missed half the game trying.
Is it worth all the sneaking to get better seats? Maybe, maybe not, it really depends on the scenario.
All I know is that the MAC Conference Tournament has become just like a MasterCard commercial. Upper deck tickets: $8. Sneaking up to within two rows of Charlie Coles: priceless.
