It is midterm season, and that means two things: 1) We are halfway through the semester and, 2) Group projects!!! Some professors go with midterm exams - can someone say boring and unoriginal? I can!

The innovative professors prefer PowerPoint presentations, group papers and speeches to the traditional blue books and multiple-choice questions. For those of you with said innovative professors, get ready for the most awkward tradition in academia. Nothing says "group projects" like the hesitant exchange of email addresses, the dead-end conversation about mutual friends and the classic fallback of, "Oh my god! I love your shirt!"

And while it may seem like being paired with the brace-face in the unicorn shirt is as bad as it gets, think again. Take a gander at these group project possibilities, and maybe you'll reconsider.

Spanish 311 10-minute speech on Peru

Partner: Dora the Explorer

Dora: Hola! Have you seen my cesta?

You: I don't think our presentation needs to involve baskets.

Dora: Is it under the table?

You: What?

Dora: Is it on this shelf?

You: Dora, your basket is in your left hand. Can we please talk about our presentation, now?

Dora: Is it in my hand?

You: We've been here for three hours, Dora, and accomplished absolutely noth-

Dora: You found it! It's in my hand!

You: Great, we found it. Let's get started, OK? I'm thinking we should do an outline .

Dora: Now that we have my basket, we can go to Blueberry Hill! Do you want to go to Blueberry Hill?

You: No, just like I didn't want to go to Grape Mountain, Peach Field or Cupcake River.

Dora: First we need a mapa. Do you know where my mapa is?

You: What the hell do you need a map for?

Dora: Is it under the table?

You: ....

Dora: Is it on this shelf?

You: It's in your backpack.

Dora: Is it in my backpack? You found it! It's in my backpack!

You: I think it's safe to say that I hate you more than I have ever hated any other 6-year-old child before in my life.

Dora: Have you seen my -

You: OH MY GOD! ARE YOU SERIOUS!?!?!

MKT 291 Power Point about what to sell

Partners: Kanye West and Willy Wonka

You: So, what product are you thinking about?

Willy Wonka: Pully-Polly-Peely Whatsit Mango Flips.

You: Hm, well, before we pick … whatever it is you just said … we should probably -

Kanye: OK, OK, listen: I am happy for you, and I respect you, but Willy was talking. OK? OK? Willy was talking, and he was talking better than you have ever talked. Than you have ever talked.

Willy: The shnozberries taste like shnozberries!

Kanye: Can I just say that Beyonce has the best wallpaper not just of the year but of every wall ever built, OK?

You: What does Beyonce have to do with this?

Kanye: OK, just, OK I'm sorry, but listen. I respect you, and I respect that you won -

You: Won what?

Kanye: - and I am happy for you, but I don't think you deserve this nor am I happy for you. OK?

HST 197 skit

Partner: Hannibal Lector:

Hannibal: You look delicious.

You: OK … this meeting is over.

Hannibal: No, wait, don't leave! I brought lotion!

POL 142 group essay

Partners: M. Night Shyamalan and the

Kool-Aid Man

M. Night: So, we've got the plot, let's get the twist!

Kool-Aid Man: Oooooh yeeeaahhhh!

You: We're writing a paper about the World Bank. There is no "twist."

M. Night: There's always a twist.

Kool-Aid Man: Oooooh yeeeaaah!

M. Night: Yeah, right? He gets it, do you get it?

You: No, I don't, it doesn't make any sense.

M. Night: OK, fine, let's try something else -

Kool-Aid Man: Oooh yeeeaaahhhh!

M. Night: Try this on. The aliens were dead all along because the plants killed them once the Lady in the Water revealed the village elders were really the monst -

You: That's not an idea for a paper. That's all the plot twists of your crappy movies bundled into one nonsensical statement.

Kool-Aid Man: Ooooh yeeaaa -

You: I swear to Zeus, Kool-Aid Man. If you do not shut up I will drink all of your fruit punch goodness until you are nothing more than a pitcher.

M. Night: What about this? A young couple adopts a mouse-

You: No.

Do you see now? Do you see how bad group projects could be? You should be thankful to be partnered with Holly Halitosis. Thankful.

Enjoy midterms season now because it only comes once a semester!