Leah, Hannah, Joel, Aaden, Collin, Alexis, Cara and Mady are the adorable "plus 8" that make up the Gosselin clan; a family that any sane person can't help but love. I have watched this troublesome brood win over the hearts of America every Monday on TLC ... mine being one of them. I cant help but choke up every time one of those little tykes shares their toys, takes their first step or utters the adorable phrase, "coming up next on 'Jon and Kate plus 8'"-accompanied, of course, by their infamous impish grins. When the little boys were finally potty-trained, I quite literally shot teardrops out of my eyeballs with more force than when I watched Rose finally let go of Jack-his frozen face still haunts my dreams. I'm not obsessed … really I'm not … I'm just another 20-year old girl in love with "Jon and Kate plus 8."
But why? Why is over half of the Miami University population … and perhaps the world … mesmerized by this American family? Why is the whole campus abuzz when Hannah goes to the horse farm or when Mady was finally allowed to get her ears pierced? Why is it that my heart actually skipped a beat when I discovered that a friend of mine owns the first season on DVD? After extensive scientific research and analysis-sort of-I have stumbled upon two juxtaposing conclusions.
One trivial, awful, untrue and absurd theory that I can not claim to be my own- t was derived from the uninformed mind of my father-is that Americans are simply bored and easily seduced by corny syndication. To this ill-supported theory I merely say … "False."
I do no accept that offensive conclusion … Dad. In fact, I am ashamed of it; embarrassed that I stem from a man who could believe such horrible things. It is this same lack of family love that further supports my theory on this nationwide Gosselin-love epidemic. My insightful hypothesis is-drum roll please-we want to be one of them.
We yearn to be a part of this glorious family of ten. We long to ride in their black caravan, strapped to our car-seat, wedged between Collin, Aaden and Joel. We desire to ride our tricycle up and down the driveway alongside Alexis and Leah. We crave to be a sass-ball with Mady, a sweetheart with Cara and brush "Puddin" (a stuffed horse) with Hannah. We NEED to have Kate obsessively clean-up after us and see Jon roll his eyes at her compulsion. Is that really so much to ask? Can you blame me for dreaming about the day I wake up a Gosselin? If you can, than to hell with ya. All I can say is, prepare to have the wrath of the female student body rain down upon you … and believe me you do not want that.
No matter how you feel, it's undeniable; "Jon and Kate plus 8 … and Liz too" clearly has an outstanding ring to it, does it not?







